Shiny Happy Lies
***Trigger Warning (TW): Let Us Prey discusses child sex abuse (CSA) within religion(s), and as such includes difficult topics, including personal accounts of CSA that may be triggering or traumatizing.
Like many others this week I started watching the new Amazon Prime docuseries Shiny Happy People. I have only watched two episodes so far and I think it’s important to already bring awareness to a couple of issues and concerns.
While I appreciate that more and more of these types of exposure documentaries are coming out, they can still be problematic. For starters, I share in the sentiments of one of my favorite disability activists Andrew Gurza when he tweeted “We need to stop creating documentary after documentary about Christian abuse scandals (looking at you ‘Shiny Happy People’) and actually do something to stop it.” Couldn’t have said it better myself. At what point are we beyond the need for awareness and need to move on to the next steps of doing something about that awareness?
Also, it is very very important to loudly discuss the issue of the producers featuring Jim Holt in this docuseries. Many survivors of the IBLP, as well as, credible reporters within the anti-cult/CSA community begged the producers to not use Jim Holt since he is a known abuser and currently facing legal troubles with his wife and son, including long strict orders of protection and restrictions on being alone with his granddaughter (ick!). While most of his stories about the Duggars were true there were of course some lies. And it is always a concern when interviewees are allowed to lie unchecked because laymen viewers won’t know it’s a lie and be mislead. Of course the biggest issue with featuring Jim Holt is the pain and trauma to his victims and survivors. One of the docuseries focuses was on the culpability of TLC for giving abusers a platform causing normalization/desensitization of dangerous beliefs and practices, the spread of those beliefs and practices, and of course wealth and fame to predators and abusers. Yet despite calling out TLC, the producers do the very same thing by giving air time and money to another abuser. They were directly told about Jim Holt before production began and ended. And even then chose to not only film and pay him, they also chose to not add a disclaimer about him post-production which they very easily could have.
Just like other true crime documentaries it is vital that we stop giving fame and attention to the monsters and instead accurately, adequately and sensitively share survivors’ stories. Survivors need to be listened to and given what they need for justice and healing! Jim Holt and Jim Bob Duggar DO NOT need anymore airtime or money, period!
And lastly, my only other note about the docuseries is that while this may seem obvious I do want to offer an extra caution/trigger warning. I am an avid follower of the Duggar history and current legal proceedings. I have watched every documentary about religious and cult CSA. And I of course openly and regularly discuss these topics as a survivor. I knew exactly what was going to be in this docuseries and had already gotten to see quite a bit of footage before the release. And yet, I have been significantly more triggered than I thought I would be. I unexpectedly lost it during Episode 2 and my husband had to come hold me and comfort me. I’m limiting myself to one episode at a time and taking breaks between them as well.
Not only is it extremely painful to see the abuse and pain of other children, and to be reminded of my own similar experiences, but then you have to deal with the mirror/reflection effect. Watching this docuseries has reminded me how much I still subconsciously hold on to the strict beliefs of my childhood and allow them to negatively affect my life, even at 40-years-old. I detest the beliefs I was taught and have fought my entire adult life to break free from them and yet as “free” and “feisty feminist” as I want to believe I am I still chronically people please, submit, suppress my needs and pretend to be happy because that is what I was taught women should do. I still have trouble breaking rules or not painfully striving to be perfect. I am loyal, dedicated and nurturing often at the expense of my own health and happiness. I hate it! I hate it because I feel I’m not that way because I want to be, but rather because I was brainwashed to be through fear and abuse. I suppose that despite it’s issues, this docuseries at least offers some comfort in the knowledge that I am not alone with those experiences or struggles.
So give it a watch, but keep a skeptical and critical eye. And help spread awareness about the hypocrisies, the lies, the culpability and the lack of action to stop continue religious CSA.